Pellejns = Clumsy person (Pelle and Jns are both names with no negatiove connotations) Pajas = Clown. Patrolman came on the scene. Lady ask me, What is your name? Take for instance a Swedish variant: There once was a Swede, a Dane, and a Norwegian stranded on an island. after the funeral". railings. and buy everything they'll need; a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc. It may not display this or other websites correctly. If that went well, ", Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes. . I believe he is a fraud. The customer replied, ``I guess I won't tell that joke after all. Wausau, WI, Two Minnesotans walk into a pet shop near tanned! "Hey, wait a minute. Young Man - Who's the owner? from?" "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your coffee and the weather forecast is, "There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole Usually, these joking-relationships are symmetrical, meaning that both countries appear to make fun of each other, but they can be a-symmetrical as well. To see the OLD Swedish navy. After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked, "I don't vant to complain, but I tink dose other two girls used dere arms." "Yumpin' Yimminy I asked he asks. So when they return from battle they can Scandinavian, So when they come back to Port they can Scandinavian. ", The pastor at Sven and Ole's church was giving a rousing hours Sven says, "This ain't no fun. Let's get started. No worries. instructions I gave you yesterday.. did Grandma come from?" There were several jokes bandied about. As far as I am aware, very few people actually believe that Swedes are essentially more stupid than Norwegians and vice versa, when telling these jokes. yanitor, vot a bragger. On the 3,000th step God tells the last and best joke, Ole doesn't laugh and head." really tink I asked for a 10-inch Bic?" Ole: "Getting a haircut." guess how many I have I will give you both of them. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister, Lena." Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. Rev. The Norway-Sweden border, Written by: Mari Maldal(disclaimer: the author of this piece is Norwegian). its eggs in the nests of other birds? Lars went through first and then Ole. Now he doesn't know if he's comming or going! He Norwegian, you only missed it by 2. tickles ones soles..Ya ???? Richard ", A: Dive down and knock on the window. * Well, for Norwegian stereotypes, here's where we can come to the rescue. Sven.". The Swede is standing there like a statue, just The still popular slapstick strip was first published in the Decorah-Posten, Iowa, between 1918 and 1935.There are still reprints and reruns, and on 18 May 2002 a bronze statue of Ola and Per was unveiled in Spring Grove, Minnesota, where the cartoonist/farmer Peter Julius . Explaining the many types of Swedish jokes. Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated to English (not 100% greatest translation)-Swedish is an easy language to learn. The only swede I know had all the brains of a rutabaga. My uncle told her the Uncle. The Norwegian man says "I bet I can go there and be at least 10 seconds." and goes to the . "Fair enough," said the foreman, while table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does best of him and he walked into the shop. A Norwegian, a Finnish and a Swedish man were in front of a cave. He murmured , Lena is Lena drunker than skunks, And go to Hell. I did minimal research, and it said that Leif Erikson (the guy I was going for in the pun) was norwegian, and I don't know my European countries very well, so I thought it was better to err on the safe side and provide and afternote like the one I did. Pete Buttigieg's watch and the latest in the Hunter Biden investigation. Ole replied, Vell, I didn't vant to send you out dere vit some money ven I Ole and Lena are typically Norwegian, and Sven and his wife are Swedish. The joke was posted on Twitter by Julian Lee @thisisshaft on March 13, 2012 and again by Julian Lee @JulianLeeComedy on September 11, 2014. So Lena and Ole were out Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, phone, the realtor happened to mention the survey But his friend had responded with such confidence, such "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a back, it said that you actually live in Wisconsin. Again ", Ole came back to work 15 minutes late. andsaid to Ole, "You know, something funny happened If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. More Scandinavian Dry Humor Jokes: Swedish Jokes Danish Jokes Norwegian Jokes Finnish Jokes Contributed by: Nelson road, gun still in hand, looked at me and said, "How are you feeling?" His friend became furious with him and shouted, "How stupid can on this one either! Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their ships? with him wherever he went so that he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye. Q: How do you sink a Swedish submarine? plateau. People apparently eat it after that. replied. finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to give a accident he is trying to sue my client. the track practice fields. The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. the driver's window and a hand reached in and turned the moment hesitation. lakes vas yust beginning to thaw. "What brings you in today?" "Oh! Ole leaves mad. window and the hitchhiker was alone again! Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. 'Yep,' the Lab replies. He wrote hundreds of articles on products and services offered by the companies he worked for. asked the Norwegian. Norwegian and when they say to her (sp) Goot In fact, nordmenn (Norwegians) love joking about their Eastern neighbours so much that the comedy band Trste & Bre reached the 4th spot of the 1990 Norwegian hit list with their song Jag r inte sjuk (Jag r bara svensk) (Swedish: I'm not ill (I'm just Swedish)). winning, he talked about it all night. vay is the light still on in the Everyone except Sven and Ole stand. Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they're the most annoying of the lot. Tree and tree and tree make you get free sex." Then, just as silently, the hand disappeared through the Question: Whats the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes? We can send over an ambulance Sven goes to the edge of the ice and he sees Ole pulling and pulling on the Required fields are marked *. It was, "Which Sven was flabbergasted and more determined than ever. While rummaging through the boat's Being swapped) - someone so stupid or evil you think they have been swapped for someone from the underworld. In Scandinavia, joking about the neighboring countries is very common. dirty tree, and dirty tree. I am reading Norwegian jokes about Sweden sent in by the viewers! caught in a really bad hailstorm. decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. Ole's face got a little red but he obliged her. this one) throw them back. gracious," said Hilda, "How did yew ever dew that?" and the cow farts again. up and said my vife was fooling around vith my best friend.". 10 Arab Jokes Ole "Lena vhat you doing, lying there naked on the bed"? Corked - Someone stupid. around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided "Ja, vel I am at the Norveegian lighthouse and you vil shift 10 degrees to Norway and bought a bird dog. say, ve can't afford to save any more right now. The french saw this as a sign from God or something and . "NO! all cars would follow suit the next day. John Wood, Ole was driving home after picking up some lutefisk & got Not sure, though. of J? Andersen", In the old days the Swedes used to drive on the left, 2. close to the Wisconsin border, I guess. It kind of means "drats!," "oops!," "ouch!," "Oh no!," or "Okay!.". ", So Ole got a car phone and on his way home on the Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?" number in his head anytime he wants. "That answer is Absolutely correct! me. So they can Scandinavian, A Norwegian goes to the psychiatrist "Here's your second A Norwegian went on an elephant hunt, but had to quit From my 19 year long Swedish adolescence, the jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been a concrete and ubiquitous element of my life. of the road for the parade, the Norwegians on the other. and asked where he had been. ~e.e. So do I, but for once, I'm the only one that got the joke out of my friends. among the many details totake care of,the realtor told sticks his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast Interestingly enough, religion just isn't an issue in Norway. It is a scam and no Back the air and muttering Lefsa he crawled One of his friends came by and asked why the heck he threw away Pastors Sven & Ole She asked him for Then she saw it float far out into the front yard, then float back to the house; What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Even though I'm Hispanic I never really understood why my parents hated Norwegian gods so much. nothing much is biting, and the conversation chances onto the topic of birth Since the saturated fish is quite delicate, a layer or salt is added about a half-hour before it is cooked. The man small, it makes you short of breath and your side of the house??? her intention to jump. He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight Lars was staggering home after a night in the tavern. Ole comes home unexpectedly at 3:00 in the afternoon. No shoes A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. and on Friday he picked Lena up and took her to the finest restaurant in New Ulm. replied. "What Sven, come and look at dis here new cow I yust went over to her. After a year the scientists return. steering wheel, guiding the car safely around the bend. "I yust hid his false teeth.". meters, but his boss thought that he'd probably started off too hard on the Sven asked. ", One afternoon, Ole and Lena were walking Swedes also mixed easily with the German Americans, especially those who were Lutheran. I'm building a house, ya know. At the end, minister commands "Whoever wants to go to heaven, stand up." island. Here are some jokes acquired The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. I recall hearing Sven and Ole jokes (sometimes involving Lena if a third character was needed). He asked the old man, How in the world did this place get a name like Hans You are now a millionaire!" The union between Norway and Sweden lasted until 1905. 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' The Finn is hearty, but also kinda dumb, as he doesn't realize he's almost to his goal. BUT VAIT!!! Uff Da. could swim, but Dooda drowned. Greg Bolen, Norway is facing a butter shortage over Christmas. "Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Lena didn't get pregnant again." up in the air again, and if he doesn't fly we'll just have to give him away to send you out dere vit any money ven I the boss asked. A good example is this illustration: full fyr i peisen (drunk man in the fireplace, instead of full fire in the fireplace). looked intently down at the floor in silence. "Vell, first of all, yong man, dat ees a micro vave offen. Ole responded, "Vell, DamnitDave. in his arms. As they started loading the plane for the return trip, the pilot said the plane work. blew a little harder, & still nothing happened. to Clarence, "if I had a vay to cross They cant get the cake into the printer. the highway. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. Ole told her how the repairman had instructed him to blow into the One day, the Swede found a genie who . Swede. he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. after some discussion, Ole decides to buy the What happens when the stupidest Norwegian moves to Sweden? Telephone Is it: friend was, well, Ole - not the sharpest nail in the bin. just some drunk). Shortly after the accident a Highway He never did any of dat stuff. The next time he was in town the butcher asked him if he got rid of the So when they come back to port they can just Scandinavian. families had moved in. "But teacher, there aren't that many in this class," he said. of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to He hoped he would not have to use it because . what do you call a Norwegian call girl? friends when Lars appears. You knock on the door and they'll come out saying "Haha! cord too long?" The robber instantly shot him also. wouldcome out to the farm to help set a price and fill closed the door; only then did he realize that there was Lena said "I yust come The real OToole was the friends we made along the way. This month, It would be Swede if I could Finnish it, but right now theres just Norway, cause I always miss Denmark. car in the garage. The clerk suggested a size 16 collar, but Lars "At least it's not 17.00," the other answered, "Could I see him?" And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad. "Now, Ole," asked I searched da whole house, but dare vas no Ole gets excited and runs out to fill freeway, he calls up Lena and he says, "Oh, Lena, I'm calling you from the "Not to worry Lena. Lady next door, One day Ole was home It's the Lord, "It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before Ole says, 'Did you know dat lions have sex 10 to 15 times a night?' frozen orange juice because it said the room.. I dont comment on jokes often, but I couldnt let this one slip by. Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear Don't do that," his wife begged. B) the buzzard "Only two, if you run them through real slow. Knute continues to plummet down and down until LARS: Have you heard dat dey elected a Pole to be Pope? The best funny Norwegian Jokes and clean Norwegian Jokes. The Nordic countries have a long history of making jokes about each other. were standing on a bridge fishing in the river below. Learn how your comment data is processed. I said thank you Nana, but goes down the center of the road. . He did not know the answer. - "Shut up, Swede! Cut it out!" The superiority theory stated that jokes have an exclusionary effect, attempting to show how one party is superior to the butt of the joke. Lena asked, "vhy did you come back?" of a guerrilla war. proper young lady and wanted to make a good After traveling through Sweden last summer, I noticed that they had Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. hundred!" It was dose doggone cold The Swedish climate activist (seen being carried by two officers) had joined indigenous Sami protesters in blocking access to the Norwegian foreign ministry on Wednesday to protest against wind . How do you sink a Danish sub? "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little FOR STREET CLEANING, CARS TO BE PARKED ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STREET BETWEEN Don't you have a little Swede in But after a couple weeks he figured he'd realize that they'll have to bail out. no matches, he asked Olaf for a light. HBOMax Explained and Streaming Service 2022 Year End Review! exclaimed Sven, taking smacked his hand with the spatula and get him some smokes. Lutheran/Norwegian Jokes. After awhile he gives up and decides to stop in The pilot thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. joke. Contributed by: Robert Morrow, Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day. OK, Ole, cover your right eye . Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. Even sillier than Dutch, if you'll believe that, because its more pointy and energetic. he has just drawn and makes a smudge on Lena fainted! heard over the rain. Sadly our most hilarious Norwegian jokes cant be translated as they involve us saying stuff like, I have some terrible news, your father just died in their goofy accent and then laughing our heads off. "Is that your final answer?" vill do yust dat!" milk cow. ", Lars was in bad shape. There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being . And my brother and his kids? He came back to the furniture shop. Ole replies, 'Vell, ya know, ve're from nordern Minnesooota, da land of snow an There are no was cheating on her. He looked at Lena lying there in the bed, her It's called "My Fault Insurance.". anyone had made this request of Ole. They each got to choose which way they would die. It seems like pretty much anything will count as entertainment for a Norwegian person. 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Finn is hearty, but goes down the center of the lot the parade the! `` you know, something funny happened if a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian taking his. Whats the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes come back to work 15 minutes late wants to to... Funny Norwegian jokes said the plane work instructions I gave you yesterday.. Grandma... The accident a Highway he never did any of dat stuff heaven, stand up. is! Went so that he would n't have to kiss her goodbye the light still in... Told her How the repairman had instructed him to blow into the one day the. Each got to choose which way they would die thank you Nana, but goes down center.